The Hagbergs at the Pediatrician...

I did have a great experience at the hospital and felt very well taken care of, but I couldn't stay there forever and Jeff was anxious to get home.  We had the option of staying at the hospital one more day but we made the decision to go home.

 Clark in his "going home outfit"

All tuckered out :)

 I love his laid back look here

 Jeff's mom Michele had hung a banner to welcome Clark home on our mirror.  I cried.

Clark's first time in his crib.  So tiny!

First time at home as a family, well minus Rupert :(  He was still at the kennel, it was weird to be home without his friendly face!

So when we were at the hospital Clark didn't cry that much.  In fact, they asked us which one of us was laid back--of course we both said me--because Clark was SO laid back!  The night we got home from the hospital Clark cried for hours.  We didn't know what to do!  It was the middle of the night.  We had fed him "20 CC's" which is more than what they told us to feed him at the hospital, his diaper was clean, we did everything we knew what to do!  We started to get worried that we overfed him.  The thought crossed our minds that he could be hungry, especially since my body was giving us clues that it was time to feed the baby, but we quickly changed our minds to the thought that we must have given him too much.  Jeff decided to call the pediatrician for advice.  She heard him screaming in the background and asked Jeff if he was hungry.  He said that he couldn't be, that we fed him "20 CC's!"  She said, "Sir, that's an ounce.  He can eat around 3 ounces every 2 hours."  Poor kid was starving!!  Jeff hung up the phone and we fed our child.  He stopped crying and went to sleep.  Oh wow, is it that obvious that we are new parents?  We were both embarrassed but had a good laugh.

The first week at home was kind of a blur.  We were instantly in love with Clark, but we were clearly newbies and were trying to figure out our kiddo.  I was also still very drugged up, we were sleep deprived, and I think becoming an instant dad when Jeff had hardly even ever held an infant before was a bit of a shock and a major adjustment for him (even though he was doing a fabulous job), not to mention every time we tried to breastfeed, Clark screamed at the top of his lungs which was a little stressful for all of us.  Everyone kept saying to relax because Clark can tell when I'm tense, but it was hard to relax when he was screaming that hard.  We went to the point of lighting candles, turning the lights down, putting a heating pad on my back, rocking, closing my eyes, and blaring Enya on my noise-canceling headphones to relax while he screamed.  That didn't even do the trick!  We decided to go to another lactation specialist.

Clark right before the appointment

We had an appointment with the lactation specialist and an appointment to get Clark circumsized within an hour of each other...on a Monday.  Most people know that Mondays are crazy at doctors offices because everyone has been waiting all weekend to get in.  They were 1/2 hour behind for our first appointment so Jeff started getting anxious and worried that we were going to miss our next appointment and have to pay for it or at least have a hassle of having to reschedule and come back.

We finally got in there and started with the lactation lady.  She wanted to weigh him and check him over, so she told us to take off all his clothes and wrap him in our blanket.  Blanket?  What blanket?  we were supposed to bring a blanket?  She looked at us like we were bad parents and were going to freeze our poor newborn in the middle of the winter with no clothes on and no blanket!  Note to self: bring blanket next time.

We started to try breastfeeding so she could observe us.  Clark was screaming, per usual, and we were trying to talk to her and work with Clark and the pediatrician came in to tell us about the circumcision.  The lactation lady slipped out of the room after our unsuccessful attempt and the pediatrician took over.  She was talking a mile a minute in a really excited tone and I couldn't understand anything she was talking about.  I suddenly felt like I didn't know a thing about the male anatomy and it all became very complicated.  She even drew a picture to explain where things were.  I still felt clueless and was still in a haze from the pain meds and lack of sleep and suddenly panicked that this was all so rushed and this lady who I couldn't understand and seemed to have 10 too many cups of coffee that day was the one that was going to be slicing my baby boy.  I could feel tears coming.  She wisked him away without time to have a second thought about it.  As soon as they left and we had an empty room, Jeff said, "should we pump?"  I was totally in another zone and said "sure." So Jeff got the parts out, I tried to use my discreet nursing tank top and nursing bra and couldn't even figure that out, so whipped them both off and started to pump.

All of a sudden my face felt red and I couldn't believe what we were doing!  Here I am topless in the pediticians office pumping and I couldn't imagine if someone walked in and I was in that state.  I told Jeff I would totally be embarrassed if someone walked in and he said "no it's good, we're multitasking!"  Then Jeff looked like he had a realization.  He said, "wait, is that lacation lady coming back?"  I said, "yes!" he said, "oh we shouldn't be pumping!"  I said "exactly!" so he pulled off the pumping gear and milk is flying and I'm frantically trying to put my clothes back on before someone comes back in the room.  We started laughing hysterically and we needed that!  We both couldn't believe what we were just doing.  I took a big drink of water and started laughing again and snorted it out my nose all over me and the floor.

Moments later, the Pediatrician came back in with Clark!  He had his hands behind his head and had a "cigar"--a rolled up paper towel dipped in sugar water--sticking out of his mouth.  She told us he slept through the procedure!  I couldn't believe it!  I guess the sugar water cigar really worked!  She said she put a diaper on loosely and she was going to check on him again in a few minutes.  I held Clark for about a minute before he pooped all over.  I mean all over.  I said, "Jeff, it's really warm on my lap right now."  He got up and looked and there was poop all over Clark, me, the bench I was sitting on, the floor...everywhere.  He started grabbing paper towels and made a dam with them and started cleaning everything up.  Just then, the lactation lady came back.  Jeff said, "oh we can't really do that right now,"and she said, "oh, ok." Then the pediatrician came back in and was explaining how to care for Clark's owie while the lactation lady was talking to me at the same time.  I was half listening to both of them and not really listening to either of them as a result.

Suddenly they both left, I didn't know how to care for Clark and didn't have any help with breastfeeding.  I couldn't believe Jeff would send her away when I really needed her help!  I started crying.  He explained he wasn't trying to send her away, just that the diaper situation needed to be taken care of first!  It was a sad car ride back home.  We drove into the garage and Jeff had set up a tennis ball for me in the garage so I have a target to hit (Not the best at spacial awareness) so he hit the tennis ball slowly, then turned his head and kept driving right into the wall!  And I was laughing hysterically again.   I think he was a little worn out from the experience...we all were.  I began to realize I was feeling very unstable--laughing hard one minute, bawling the next...at least there were laughs among the tears!

More to come on the adventures of the Hagberg family :)